


and the heart is hard to translate

by melliesgrant



Category: Twin Peaks
Genre: F/M, but this is pretty much just their feelings for each other throughout the show, the ending is bad because i honestly couldnt anymore w s2 it was so bad, ugh they deserved more
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-08-13 12:47:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7977298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melliesgrant/pseuds/melliesgrant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oh, how Audrey Horne loved Agent Cooper, she loved him in the purest way that could only end in tragedy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	and the heart is hard to translate

They fall in love in different ways, she falls in love at first sight, and he falls in love (or realizes he's in love) when it’s too late. 

The minute Audrey Horne lays eyes on Dale Cooper she knows she’s falling in love, something about him draws her to him, and within their first conversation he is all she thinks about. Her days are spent wondering what he’s doing, what will happen the next time they talk, how she can help with the case. She daydreams of him coming to her, confessing her love, taking her in his arms and dipping her, kissing her and taking her away from Twin Peaks. No, just taking her wherever he wanted to stay. If he wanted to leave Twin Peaks and never go back, she’d follow, if he wanted to stay, she’d give him a tour of the town as if he hadn’t been there before. Oh, how Audrey Horne loved Agent Cooper, she loved him in the purest way that could only end in tragedy.

Dale, on the other hand, had a different experience with falling in love with Audrey Horne. It wasn’t bad, he just didn’t realize what these odd emotions bubbling inside of him meant, but they constantly lingered around him like the perfume she wore that he loved so much. How did it begin? Were those first words she spoke so enticing that he fell in love that moment and didn’t realize, or was that simple attraction he felt for the beautiful young girl. Barely eighteen, still in High School, and yet everything he could possibly want in a romantic partner. Little things continued to creep on him, those blue eyes looked into him whenever he closed his, her bright smile painted with red lipstick brought one to his face. Oh, that smile was the loveliest thing about her, there was no malice behind it, it was simply the smile of a naive girl in love. He knew she loved him from the beginning, from the way she wrote in her letters to him from the way she’d greet him in the morning as if she’d been looking forward to it since the day before. He should have ignored her, helped extinguish the blooming relationship between the two, but he was captivated not only by her beauties and charm, but the side of her personality he felt was only shown to him. A bittersweet side of her, a shred of innocence the world had not yet taken away, and an intelligence she seemed to hide from the world. He fell in love with it without even realizing, and he knows in some ways his life will be eternally changed by meeting Audrey Horne.

* * *

He walks into his room one day with an unexpected surprise, Audrey Horne with only his covers shielding her body from his eyes and her eyes filling with tears. He’s shocked, ultimately confused, and he has to force himself to resist whatever she's offering. She asks him what he wants, and he questions himself with that statement.

“What I want and what I need are two different things, Audrey.” He tries to sound sure of his statement, but anyone listening close enough could hear the vulnerability in his voice. He wants her so bad, not just in a sexual nature but in a romantic one as well, but neither of them need that at this point in their lives. She was eighteen, he was a man of the law, it wasn’t against it but it was frowned upon. That was his excuse at least, and if he really thought about it reason he said no was out of respect for her, and what their relationship could be. He didn’t really think about it though, it would just pour more water onto the seed of whatever it was they were becoming. 

He let’s her stay, gets them malts and fries and they keep each other company. Neither of them are broken people, and yet they feel as if they’ve finally been put together when they're in each other's presence. Like pieces of a puzzle, their souls match together and bring them peace, and yet something must break the puzzle and they have to work to put the pieces back together again. In the end she leaves, and he tries not to think about her too much.

* * *

 

The things she does to get his attention, Audrey thinks to herself when she finds herself in a situation she never wanted to be in. Scantily clad in a strange place that might lead to prostitution, all to help him solve the mystery that was Laura Palmer's life and death. She laughed at it, Audrey was the resident bad girl before Laura died, and all her dirty laundry was spilled. She almost wonders why she’s doing this, but remembers when she looks at the cameras around the foreign place and sees her love. Oh, he was like a movie star she’d spend her nights dreaming about in that tuxedo, and she thought that image of him could get her through whatever it was she’d have to go through. She smiled at the thought, and when he’d receive her letter and learn what she’s done to help him, oh he’d really love her she was sure of it. Foolish girl, how love has made her so silly.

Things took a turn, a hostage situation of sorts with no release in sight. Audrey Horne was trapped in hell, and her father was the Devil. Blackie was his right hand man, keeping her there because she refused to sleep with her father. At least she could now get information to help Agent Cooper, and being a girl who always got what she wanted she knew she would get it for him. So she did, with some manipulation she got a few details, nothing major, but enough that led to more daydreams of telling them all to Dale and him being so  _ so  _ thankful. Oh the things she dreamed of for them two, she was so in love that naive girl.

So she prayed to him like the almighty God she saw him as, begging him to save her and love her and see how much she cares for him. She left him a letter, and she prayed he’d open it and understand. “Oh, Dale, save me and we can live happily ever after” Her prayers and dreams repeated in her mind.

* * *

 

The disappearance of Audrey Horne hit somewhere in Dale that he wished it hadn’t, he felt a pensive sadness just thinking about it, reminiscing about her as if she were lost forever. Perhaps it would be easier that way, to let things end with a premature tragedy where he could spend his nights with the few fond memories he had of her. He wanted desperately to find her, save her from whatever she had gotten herself into, but alas his mind seemed to push that away. Instead of finding ways to save her, his mind went to her smile and her eyes. He took in the image he had in his head and broke it down, analysing her features and what they all spoke. How lovely she was, and how in love she was with him. 

He doesn’t know where she is and he doesn’t know how, but she finds a way to call him. Her sweet voice whispers in his ear as if trying to calm him down. How could he calm down when he now knew she was in real trouble? Oh, but that girl still found time to compliment him, call him a movie star in his tuxedo. Where and how did she see him like that? That was the question he posed to himself and others, pushing back the feelings her statement and honeyed voice brought to him.

* * *

 

It all stacks up and brings such strong emotions he feels like he’s going to explode. The video of her kidnapping and the letter she left find their way to him, and he hates to see her in such a cruel situation. She had done nothing to deserve this, and he  _ would  _ save her. He almost didn’t want to at first, in fear of what it might bring, her own father seeing into their relationship more than he could. Was he caring about this case as a professional, or as a friend (or more). He couldn’t think of such things when she wasn’t even here, when she was being held captive, so a deal was struck and he was to be her knight in shining armor.

The place was red all over, radiating the seduction and scandal of the place, and despite her bad girl image Dale saw Audrey as a celestial being, far too divine to be in such a place. Looking upon her pale face, unconscious and tied to a bed his heart raced with anger, fear, and relief. How could they do this to her, but at least he had found her before anything truly bad could happen. Another being in the universe tries to separate them once more, he won’t allow, and he is thankful to have stopped one more tragedy from happening to them. She tells him of her prayers in her dazed state, and he can see how he is the object of her idolatry. He unties her and carries her to safety, continuing to worry for their safety as villainous beings step in their way, but the universe allows them a rare moment of peace to get away.

He brings her to his room and checks the visible marks of the abuse she endured, needle marks taint her skin, and when she starts to speak in a nightmare like haze he tries so hard to wake her up. He could almost shake with rage, the cruelty she ignored hits him in places he didn’t know existed, and he could cry thinking about how close to death they brought her with the doses of heroin. He wants her to open her eyes, look at him, tell him what happened and what he can do. He is terrified for her, the way she speaks in her sleep causing more tension and worry and he is feeling a terrible sense of dread. He cups her face, tells her he’s here, practically begging her to wake up. Finally, those blue eyes open and her small soft hand grips his. They both feel a sense of relief in each others company, and she continues to speak of her prayers of him saving her. He is so in love and he doesn’t realize it, but it is starting to creep up on him and he doesn’t know what to do with these emotions that fill him when he’s with her. He takes her in his arm for comfort, being there for her at her most vulnerable time, is this what love is?

* * *

He finds out what she was truly used for, why she was taken away, and the blame all goes to him. He hates himself for this. His job is one where he can not have any people, connections, for they could all just be used against him. He is a man though, with a heart and emotions, and he continues to find himself caring for others along the way. He should have stayed away, to protect her, and he’ll try to do that from now on (he continues to look after her anyway, he can’t resist.)

* * *

She thinks he’s leaving when the town's biggest crime is solved, so she goes to his room and jokes around like when they first met. He obviously tries to avoid the truth, but she breaks it out with tears forming in her eyes.

“So, this is it? You save my life, then break my heart?” She means it as a joke, but it doesn’t come out that way with the tears in her eyes and her voice shaking. She doesn’t want him to go, and if he does she wants him to take her with him. 

He pulls that bullshit excuse he always says whenever she brings this up, his personal policy, because she’s eighteen and she was in a case and a whole list of reasons why he can’t be with her. She doesn’t believe it, she never did, but this is the first time she calls him out on it. Asking if someone hurt him, if someone broke his heart and that’s why he would rather break hers then get his broken again. 

It’s not what she expects, his heart did break but in a more tragic way than expected. She jokes that his old flame died, and she learns that she did. Audrey hates herself for doing that, being so careless with his words, and she hates herself more when she just sees this as proof he likes her that way too. He said he didn’t want anyone else he cared about to get hurt, that means he cares about  _ her _ . Oh, was she that much of a romantic that she would make this about her? She was, she was a selfish little girl with daddy issues, who fell in love with a man who could never love her back. 

Despite his tale of woe, they still find themselves with smiles and hope for the future. He tries to stop her emotions, just for his words to be used against him, and they both are equally grateful to see the others smile once more.

She jokes he needs to watch out, because one day she’ll be grown up, and he laughs as if she’s a child. She doesn’t mind, she knows there’s  _ something _ , whether he’d admit it or not. Before she leaves she says one more thing, no jokes, just a statement she believes in. “You know, there’s only one problem with you...you’re perfect.” She leaves, not seeing nor knowing how much she and her words affected him. She walks away, he looks away, and wishes things could change.

* * *

He keeps his distance and she refuses to keep hers, and in all honesty he doesn’t mind. He watches as each time she comes to him she tries to act older than she actually is, and has something for him. She tries so hard to impress him, be of some help, and most of the time she is. He finds it sweet, the things she does, not caring that the first time she tried to help led to her kidnapping. He almost hates himself because of it, seeing all she does for him, and realizing how little he does for her.

Denise interrupts, and he expects nothing more to happen, maybe Audrey would come back that night to talk. He didn’t know, but he didn’t expect what did happen to be right then and there. It was quick, too short for either to really put all they wanted into it. She kissed him, went on her tippy toes and pushed her lips against his. She was over before he could kiss her back, tell her he loved her with his actions rather than his words. He tried to pretend it didn’t happen, but he continued to taste her on his lips and think about what could’ve been at night.

* * *

They stop talking, not on purpose, but their paths never cross in any importance again. They try to move on, claiming to love sad excuses for replacements of each other. Audrey cries at night at the thought at what could have been, and Dale suffers for eternity for so many other reasons. He thinks of Audrey in the midst of the misery and suffering he endures, thinking of all that he pushed away and gave up on. He realizes and accepts that he loves her. In the end she regrets not trying harder, and he loved her more than she would ever know, and she was gone before he could ever tell her.


End file.
